(scroll clear to bottom to see some fun pics of our fam over the years!♥️)

This is my eighth Thursday making time to write here on my blog> Halfway there!! I have felt a bit heavy each Thursday after I finish my blog entries. I think it’s because I have been touching on some of the hard parts of my life, without elaborating the ups in those experiences! I want to spell out my truth (even the hard parts) in a manner that is helpful and inspiring to anyone my lines cross with!! I am going to keep working at it! 

When reading my last post to my mom she said, “that isn’t my Amber.. that’s not you!” I think she is partly right. It is going to take some concentrated effort for me to share the hard parts and the good that transpires through my experiences. I am good at sharing the good parts on my personal Facebook page. I do feel, life is what we make it and I am only human. I am an optimistic girl, who sorta tries to forget the hard parts.. forget all the No’s before the YES, all the falls before the WINS, all the hard work before the SUCCESS!! 

As my husband, Johnny and I close in on celebrating our twenty year wedding anniversary I plan to put together a video that portrays the rewarding, good and some of the hard parts of our journey! I would say our journey has been pretty chaotic at times. I wouldn’t have it any other way!!                                                      

……. and she embraced the chaos.. as it painted her life with purpose. -JH Hard

Last week I was on the swing in our backyard having coffee with our oldest son, Keith who is twenty years old. He struck up a conversation with me about utilitarianism.. he is learning and writing about this theory in his Ethics class. Utilitarianism is the doctrine that states that actions are right if useful or for the benefit of the majority. Keith and I both seem to agree with the principles of utilitarianism.

As the conversation unfolded, Keith said he feels like he’s been growing a lot from year to year, especially in the last couple since he’s been college. He then went on to think about (do the math) where I was.. at the same age he currently is. 

He went on to say, “you mean you had two kids by the time you were twenty?!” “You also were married and had bought your first home?!” My response was, “yes, we actually had you at seventeen during our Jr. year of high school, we were crowned prom king and queen our Sr. year and graduated high school. We planned and were expecting our second son (Landon) with lack of much experience, married a month out of high school at eighteen years old!! I worked as a certified nurse’s aide from the time I was sixteen and your Dad was working for ASM Woodworks!”

  At that moment, as I was visiting with Keith I remembered how much we have overcome and accomplished! I also realized how good it felt to have someone you love with all your heart (the very person you refused-to-quit for).. admire your success and acknowledge how hard that it must have been. 

In one way I feel like my life’s journey is just as is supposed to be.. in the same token, I definitely want our adult children to choose a different path than we did. At least set themselves up for financial success before starting their families.

 How else do you embrace the chaos?.. than to just put your best foot forward and make the best of what’s in front of you?!
The more Keith and I visited, the more I realized what a fast path our lives have been on! 

I ended up being pregnant with our third son, Isaac as I was finishing cosmetology school. I cried because it was different than we planned! I had been working with the small business administration and had secured financing to open a salon in our home town, Lacrosse, Ks. I graduated cosmetology school while renovating our first salon location. Then, within a couple years we completely revamped a second, larger location and relocated. 

Within two years of Isaac.. a.k.a. Ike being born our daughter, Aleah came into our lives. She was under a year old and my cousin’s first born daughter. My cousin was struggling with mental health and addiction and had turned to my parents for help. My mom approached me to take Aleah. We didn’t think a daughter was in the cards for us. The good Lord had a different plan. I had been very sick with preeclampsia during pregnancy and we had counseled with our doc at every prenatal visit about getting my tubes tied. We did just that (after my third high risk pregnancy) and giving birth to our third son.. I had a tubal ligation! 

Around the same time Haley, who was fifteen and her sister, Allison, who was sixteen came into our lives. They had been coming into my salon for hair services and had been our kiddos primary babysitters for a couple of years. They had had a tough circumstance unfold in their homestead and were told by local deputies to leave the premises of their home for the time being. We ended fighting for six weeks to get a case filed. We enrolled in the Model Approach to Parenting (MAP) classes and became licensed foster parents in all three of the girls behalf. While all of this was unfolding my husband, Johnny and I would have been in our early twenties!

We were meeting with support workers, social workers, attending court appearances, counseling sessions and even sold our first home to upsize to a homestead that would accommodate six kids. We somehow made it through this chapter as Allison graduated and Haley went to a different girls home for a duration and obtained her G.E.D. just before having her first baby.   

Aleah’s adoption was finally finalized after her birth giver’s rights were terminated in 2008, just before she turned six years old. We were continuously in and out of court for five years!

By this time we had relocated our family to Salina, Ks to open a larger salon. We once again worked with the S.B.A. to secure financing and opened our first Thiessen-Elise Salon location in downtown Salina. We were determined to make a go in the beauty industry against all the odds that faced us. A lot of hard things presented themselves. Nothing more detrimental than a wrongful eviction that was deemed theft, just two and a half years after opening. This was all brought about after we sought legal council for signage that was to be provided, we still didn’t have a sign after two and a half years of being open. We ended up facing bankruptcy .. this hardship proved to be character building! We relocated to a better location, as well as, better circumstances.

We went through some major drawbacks. Against all odds, we relocated and reopened within four months. We have been at the location we relocated to for ten years. It has proven to be a good location for us! It’s on the busiest intersection, according to demographic counts! 
Today is the first time I have put some of the chaos in writing! I did do a live video about a year ago and some vlogs on my YouTube channel and shared them on my blogsite. 
I want to be the person that shows by leading that if I CAN DO IT, YOU CAN DO IT!! 

I am going to somehow master writing, in my own style and words and share with the world that this small town Kansas girl has what it takes!

I faced many traumatic things in my childhood as well. I grew up in a homestead with parents who started out as teens- had four kids and struggled financially, etc. My Dad was in an explosion while working in the oil fields when I was seven years old! I was the oldest of four kids. My sis, Nikki and I got to visit once during the year he was in the burn unit in Lincoln, NE. My little bros., Rob and Prep didn’t get to visit at all because they were too little.

We lost our home to a housefire when I was in Jr. High, I was in a life threatening car wreck at sixteen years of age. I have never lost sight of the realization that I exist for a reason. Especially, after surviving a car wreck.. vehicle rolled over me and I wasn’t expected to live. I have to push forward with purpose and share my message! We can be halfway to anywhere we want to be.. just have to make up our minds to go for it!!  

 At some point I earned the title, Matriarch from my mom, who has continuously struggled with her own demons. She has been a good mom, in my eyes. She struggles with how my siblings and I view her. She often talks to me about being a good mom. I always assure her I know she did the best she could, given the circumstances! I even believe a lot of my best qualities come from her!! I think she’s very similar to me in the way that the good times help to carry her through the hard times! After all, what other choice do we have?

Three tips I can give to anyone facing adversity are:

1) Believe in yourself! You will never regret working hard for your achievements! You have overcome other hard things! And you will come out stronger on the other side.

2) Find the good in everyday life! .. that even when things aren’t going as planned, find the up in it. We learn from every experience!

3) Believe great things are headed your way and they will!!.. Complaining won’t carry you in the right direction! Optimism and the law of attraction go a long way! We all have hard moments and bad experiences.. press forward and learn from them. Getting out of our comfort zone equals growth! 

I think I am the same as others, wanting to embrace all the good parts in life! I have been told that I see things differently. I found some really great quotes about living in a candy coated, rose-colored world. I can’t help but love these quotes! I decided to close today’s entry with a couple of my favorite:

 “CANDY IS CHILDHOOD, THE BEST AND BRIGHT MOMENTS YOU WISH COULD HAVE LASTED FOREVER.”   -Dylan Lauren

“I guess I kind of lived in a fairytale world…. looking at everything through rose-colored glasses. I probably always will, to a certain extent.” – Sharon Tate

Keep on keepin’ on!

Yours in Style, Amber

Halfway to anywhere you want to be! -Halfwaythere

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